You have been diagnosed with HETEROPHORIA. This means you have been to a optometrist that is knowledgeable in this field. Sorry to say very few of them are. I went to Vision Specialists of Michigan. I have also posted a list of doctors in the country that are also knowledgeable. You have been told that indeed your both eyes are not looking at the same thing. You have been fitted with prism glasses. So now the journey out of your nightmare can begin.
I was so far off with my vision I had to have prisms put in a little at a time. Too much correction would have left me in worse shape than what I came in. Some people find relief and a change right away. In my case it was not like that. Prisms were put in over a period of 3 years. I kind of knew when it was time for more correction. Dr. Debbie told me I had to find "MY NEW NORMAL" and find it I did.
A little at a time I started feeling better. Doing things I could never do before. She told me to keep a journal and whenever I noticed anything that was different to write it down. I started to notice things. Like the trees in my backyard were closer than before. Whenever my neighbor came over to visit when I was in the back yard I started to formulate my escape plan. Standing talking to anybody without any thing to hold on to meant I would get a pitching forth feeling and go into a panic. This day was no different I was waiting for the pitching forth feeling but for some reason it didn't come. I was somewhat anxious but not dizzy. My journal started filling up with things I noticed. My husband and I would go shopping on Fridays to WalMart. At this point I could shop alone while he was in another part of the store. I remember going around an isle in the store and I felt like I was walking at an angle, this was pretty scary and I felt a panic coming on and my hands were sweating. I told myself that this could be the glasses and my New Normal was trying to take hold. Also I noticed if I went to fast pushing the cart the shelf would be whizzing by and all the colors on the packages became like a kaleidoscope going around and around. This feeling was instant panic and time for the door. Agoraphobics do everything fast. We just want to get back to our safe place. Were like mice we dart in and out of our hole.
After having some success with my glasses up to this point I decided to try and work through the problem at WalMart. I forced myself to slow down. I would just stop when this happened and inspect anything that was close. I didn't want to look weird just standing there. After repeatedly doing this the feelings left. Maybe it was about a year. Again you have to realize I was a very bad case some people are not this bad.
I realized what was happening was called desensitization. I had to let the brain learn not to be afraid. It had to start to learn a new way to feel. This is not going to happen overnight but it is going to happen. You will still need a safe person until you start to trust your glasses and your self. The glasses take care of about 85 to 90% of the problem that 10 to 15 % that is left you will probably have to live with. You had nothing before your prism glasses now you are 87% better. Can you say AMEN!
Being a male makes it harder. Men are the breadwinners so there is more responsibility to bring home the bacon but don't be discouraged there are all kinds of ways to do that. Just be more creative in how you do it. And please promise me you won't blame yourself for this. You just got the wrong genes. Another thing you can think about, look at all the life lessons you have learned while being agoraphobic. Your just down right special for all you have been through. There are a lot of people who need help out there with this problem. Get well so you can help them.
Wishing you all the best. Leave a comment I would love to hear from you, I will answer. Just say HEY if nothing else.
Love you all, Yolanda
I was so far off with my vision I had to have prisms put in a little at a time. Too much correction would have left me in worse shape than what I came in. Some people find relief and a change right away. In my case it was not like that. Prisms were put in over a period of 3 years. I kind of knew when it was time for more correction. Dr. Debbie told me I had to find "MY NEW NORMAL" and find it I did.
A little at a time I started feeling better. Doing things I could never do before. She told me to keep a journal and whenever I noticed anything that was different to write it down. I started to notice things. Like the trees in my backyard were closer than before. Whenever my neighbor came over to visit when I was in the back yard I started to formulate my escape plan. Standing talking to anybody without any thing to hold on to meant I would get a pitching forth feeling and go into a panic. This day was no different I was waiting for the pitching forth feeling but for some reason it didn't come. I was somewhat anxious but not dizzy. My journal started filling up with things I noticed. My husband and I would go shopping on Fridays to WalMart. At this point I could shop alone while he was in another part of the store. I remember going around an isle in the store and I felt like I was walking at an angle, this was pretty scary and I felt a panic coming on and my hands were sweating. I told myself that this could be the glasses and my New Normal was trying to take hold. Also I noticed if I went to fast pushing the cart the shelf would be whizzing by and all the colors on the packages became like a kaleidoscope going around and around. This feeling was instant panic and time for the door. Agoraphobics do everything fast. We just want to get back to our safe place. Were like mice we dart in and out of our hole.
After having some success with my glasses up to this point I decided to try and work through the problem at WalMart. I forced myself to slow down. I would just stop when this happened and inspect anything that was close. I didn't want to look weird just standing there. After repeatedly doing this the feelings left. Maybe it was about a year. Again you have to realize I was a very bad case some people are not this bad.
I realized what was happening was called desensitization. I had to let the brain learn not to be afraid. It had to start to learn a new way to feel. This is not going to happen overnight but it is going to happen. You will still need a safe person until you start to trust your glasses and your self. The glasses take care of about 85 to 90% of the problem that 10 to 15 % that is left you will probably have to live with. You had nothing before your prism glasses now you are 87% better. Can you say AMEN!
Being a male makes it harder. Men are the breadwinners so there is more responsibility to bring home the bacon but don't be discouraged there are all kinds of ways to do that. Just be more creative in how you do it. And please promise me you won't blame yourself for this. You just got the wrong genes. Another thing you can think about, look at all the life lessons you have learned while being agoraphobic. Your just down right special for all you have been through. There are a lot of people who need help out there with this problem. Get well so you can help them.
Wishing you all the best. Leave a comment I would love to hear from you, I will answer. Just say HEY if nothing else.
Love you all, Yolanda
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